Routine

it's kind of humorous to me (kind of)
how terrifying routines are to me.
the way i fight outside of reason
to keep from being placed inside of a box of obligation.
only to find that i'd done it to myself long ago.

it's interesting to wake up to the same thoughts
every day. the same worries, the same dreams.
but they never progress, they never change.
i move along all day long, and never go anywhere.
and i blame everything else but me.

it's sobering to see the rapidity of life.
how fast it comes, and how quickly it's slipping away.
how it is actually possibly to sleep away your life.
to live in a dream world of safe routine,
only to wake up a life-time later to the end.

i don't want my recycled moments of safety.
the familiar, easy, tried.
i don't want to make it through to the end
and not have cried, fought, worked for what i love.
i don't want to wake up in the arms of GOD and feel that i hadn't done enough.